[
  {
    "start": 1.58,
    "end": 4.6,
    "text": "Do you know the difference between empathy and care?"
  },
  {
    "start": 18.8,
    "end": 20.759,
    "text": "Welcome to this week's main episode."
  },
  {
    "start": 21.4,
    "end": 26.98,
    "text": "Over the years, I've seen a lot of leaders struggle with empathy... ...and for very different reasons."
  },
  {
    "start": 27.72,
    "end": 29.04,
    "text": "Some had a lot in it."
  },
  {
    "start": 29.48,
    "end": 31.419,
    "text": "They often felt that they drained their energy."
  },
  {
    "start": 32.259,
    "end": 38.24,
    "text": "Others had extensive training on them And were still uncomfortable using or even talking about it."
  },
  {
    "start": 39.02,
    "end": 42.44,
    "text": "Quite a number didn't see as useful at all."
  },
  {
    "start": 43.36,
    "end": 46.2,
    "text": "Maybe you recognize yourself in what I just described."
  },
  {
    "start": 46.82,
    "end": 50.58,
    "text": "As someone who scores higher on empathy, i had my own challenges."
  },
  {
    "start": 51.28,
    "end": 54.34,
    "text": "Showing it was often misread as being too soft."
  },
  {
    "start": 54.92,
    "end": 59.94,
    "text": "Not showing it got people to call me cold and too direct especially for a woman."
  },
  {
    "start": 60.8,
    "end": 66.38,
    "text": "At some point It felt like I had to figure out when To turn it On And When to better switch it off?"
  },
  {
    "start": 72.68,
    "end": 75.9,
    "text": "This only changed when I understood what I had overlooked."
  },
  {
    "start": 76.54,
    "end": 78.88,
    "text": "It was the link between empathy and care."
  },
  {
    "start": 79.56,
    "end": 82.88,
    "text": "We often talk about empathy & care as if they are the same."
  },
  {
    "start": 83.5,
    "end": 85.48,
    "text": "They're connected, but aren't the same."
  },
  {
    "start": 86.26,
    "end": 92.04,
    "text": "For me it's quite a surprise When i learned that don't even activate The same areas of our brain."
  },
  {
    "start": 92.9,
    "end": 95.12,
    "text": "So let take you on a little discovery journey!"
  },
  {
    "start": 95.84,
    "end": 101.44,
    "text": "It has helped understand What empathy & Care really is And why practicing both Is what we need."
  },
  {
    "start": 102.32,
    "end": 106.74,
    "text": "I had read Emotional Intelligence, the book by Daniel Goldman during my studies."
  },
  {
    "start": 107.52,
    "end": 112.4,
    "text": "It was first published in nineteen ninety-five and not only became an international bestseller."
  },
  {
    "start": 112.78,
    "end": 115.96,
    "text": "it shaped how we look at leadership and human connection."
  },
  {
    "start": 116.86,
    "end": 137.739,
    "text": "so when i started my career as an American executive search company in two thousand five... ...I was expecting to be part of what we assessed on candidates but What I found is that it was barely touched And When I talked about with leaders and customers It felt like the idea of emotional intelligence had been bolted on top what management still heavily relied on."
  },
  {
    "start": 138.26,
    "end": 147.019,
    "text": "Strongly controlled, highly rational environments where the word emotion immediately produced discomfort or at worst reactions like this."
  },
  {
    "start": 147.6,
    "end": 149.22,
    "text": "Let's not talk about these soft skills."
  },
  {
    "start": 149.7,
    "end": 151.04,
    "text": "I need someone to get that job done."
  },
  {
    "start": 151.76,
    "end": 159.459,
    "text": "With a competency framework we started using from two thousand seven onwards i saw first shift in how we selected people."
  },
  {
    "start": 160.1,
    "end": 167.459,
    "text": "We gave our customers candidate evaluations with the emotional and social competency layer, and this included empathy."
  },
  {
    "start": 168.14,
    "end": 175.179,
    "text": "But it had to be done with caution – most importantly in line with a primary leadership style at each client organization!"
  },
  {
    "start": 175.94,
    "end": 180.959,
    "text": "Only later when collaborative leadership became more popular we could put more emphasis on it."
  },
  {
    "start": 181.64,
    "end": 183.54,
    "text": "Candidates started talking about empathy…."
  },
  {
    "start": 184.06,
    "end": 187.239,
    "text": "…and customers began asking for training that included it."
  },
  {
    "start": 188.0,
    "end": 190.5,
    "text": "Over time, the language of empathy got picked up."
  },
  {
    "start": 191.14,
    "end": 196.22,
    "text": "Organizations became more focused on employee engagement and as many would say – more human."
  },
  {
    "start": 196.92,
    "end": 203.44,
    "text": "That was a clear improvement but a lot managers were not really acting in their improved understanding of human connection."
  },
  {
    "start": 204.239,
    "end": 208.679,
    "text": "And when I experienced that my own empathy wasn't contributing to better leadership…."
  },
  {
    "start": 209.28,
    "end": 209.899,
    "text": "…I got curious."
  },
  {
    "start": 210.88,
    "end": 211.54,
    "text": "what was missing?"
  },
  {
    "start": 212.32,
    "end": 214.5,
    "text": "So i started with word Empathy itself."
  },
  {
    "start": 215.16,
    "end": 217.339,
    "text": "It's relatively modern English words."
  },
  {
    "start": 217.899,
    "end": 225.82,
    "text": "Psychologist Edward B. Titchner translated the German word Einfühlung as feeling into and coined the word empathy."
  },
  {
    "start": 226.04,
    "end": 229.72,
    "text": "around nineteen hundred nine, And what did I learn first?"
  },
  {
    "start": 230.38,
    "end": 233.54,
    "text": "At that time it didn't even mean what we use for today."
  },
  {
    "start": 234.06,
    "end": 242.179,
    "text": "It wasn't about human connection but aesthetics About projecting our own sensations onto objects looked at like a piece of art."
  },
  {
    "start": 242.899,
    "end": 249.799,
    "text": "Only in the nineteen forties did clinical psychology start using it and ways that developed into our current understanding."
  },
  {
    "start": 250.5,
    "end": 257.24,
    "text": "Just think about, we inherited a word originally wasn't people but more feeling connection with things."
  },
  {
    "start": 258.159,
    "end": 265.36,
    "text": "what I learned next was Daniel Goldman Godfather of emotional intelligence had updated his thinking over years."
  },
  {
    "start": 266.12,
    "end": 271.14,
    "text": "The book published in nineteen ninety five described empathy as single competence."
  },
  {
    "start": 271.7,
    "end": 273.58,
    "text": "It was focused on three aspects."
  },
  {
    "start": 274.3,
    "end": 281.74,
    "text": "Showing an interest in others' feelings, understanding emotional cues and being able to see things from their point of view."
  },
  {
    "start": 282.599,
    "end": 284.44,
    "text": "All three were about reading other people."
  },
  {
    "start": 284.52,
    "end": 294.46,
    "text": "well And I think this is what most train works and training initiatives picked up primarily Empathy as the ability to read other peoples emotional state."
  },
  {
    "start": 295.26,
    "end": 300.36,
    "text": "But together with Paul Ekman he gave his previous work an important update in two thousand six."
  },
  {
    "start": 301.38,
    "end": 306.62,
    "text": "After that, he no longer described it as a single competency but has three separate ones."
  },
  {
    "start": 307.5,
    "end": 313.8,
    "text": "The first is cognitive empathy understanding people's feelings and reading what's going on inside them."
  },
  {
    "start": 314.58,
    "end": 318.2,
    "text": "the second Is effective or would most people call emotional?"
  },
  {
    "start": 318.32,
    "end": 318.68,
    "text": "Empathy."
  },
  {
    "start": 319.46,
    "end": 321.159,
    "text": "so feeling with others feel."
  },
  {
    "start": 321.82,
    "end": 327.24,
    "text": "That's the kind of resonance Most People talk about when they find empathy hard Or even exhausting."
  },
  {
    "start": 328.08,
    "end": 331.88,
    "text": "It's when the other person's sadness or pain lends in our body too."
  },
  {
    "start": 332.7,
    "end": 335.82,
    "text": "The third one is the one that changed everything."
  },
  {
    "start": 336.36,
    "end": 346.539,
    "text": "Goldman called it empathic concern and, That Is The Most Important Part His extension can be read like this I see you i understand what your going through."
  },
  {
    "start": 347.08,
    "end": 348.2,
    "text": "What Can I Do To Help?"
  },
  {
    "start": 348.82,
    "end": 353.159,
    "text": "Which means a person is motivated to take action And its important know."
  },
  {
    "start": 353.58,
    "end": 357.24,
    "text": "This Third Ability Doesn't Follow Automatically from the other two."
  },
  {
    "start": 358.099,
    "end": 366.94,
    "text": "A leader can be excellent at reading other people, they can feel deeply with them and still not be motivated or able to take any meaningful action."
  },
  {
    "start": 367.719,
    "end": 377.88,
    "text": "Goldman updated his previous work with an important addition almost twenty years ago – Reading someone's emotional state, feeling with them & doing something to help them."
  },
  {
    "start": 378.4,
    "end": 379.94,
    "text": "Three separate capabilities."
  },
  {
    "start": 380.56,
    "end": 384.659,
    "text": "But it looks like People Development largely kept teaching this earlier version."
  },
  {
    "start": 385.36,
    "end": 393.2,
    "text": "What surprised me even more was that CARE specifically had been described as a key leadership practice long before Goldman got there."
  },
  {
    "start": 394.099,
    "end": 398.42,
    "text": "Robert Greenleaf has written about servant-leadership since the nineteen seventies."
  },
  {
    "start": 399.099,
    "end": 402.58,
    "text": "Compassionate leadership came later, then caring leadership."
  },
  {
    "start": 403.28,
    "end": 409.62,
    "text": "Different schools of thought different frameworks but all them naming CARE as central to human leadership."
  },
  {
    "start": 410.52,
    "end": 414.84,
    "text": "so if CARE is not missing from theory It's been there for over fifty years."
  },
  {
    "start": 415.34,
    "end": 418.159,
    "text": "Why didn't it translate into how people are actually trained?"
  },
  {
    "start": 418.92,
    "end": 422.68,
    "text": "Maybe the most surprising part of my discovery journey holds an answer."
  },
  {
    "start": 423.62,
    "end": 427.099,
    "text": "Tanja Zinger is a social neuroscientist and psychologist."
  },
  {
    "start": 427.62,
    "end": 433.7,
    "text": "For years, she and her team have been studying empathy And what she calls compassion at the level of the brain."
  },
  {
    "start": 434.479,
    "end": 441.46,
    "text": "In her research She describes Compassion as A state that combines warmth concern and The motivation to help."
  },
  {
    "start": 442.18,
    "end": 446.28,
    "text": "So Zinger calls it compassion, Goldman calls it empathic concern."
  },
  {
    "start": 446.92,
    "end": 447.86,
    "text": "Others call it care."
  },
  {
    "start": 448.34,
    "end": 453.44,
    "text": "three names for the same underlying capability but put under the umbrella of empathy."
  },
  {
    "start": 454.38,
    "end": 464.92,
    "text": "What Singer and her team developed is a picture Of what actually happens in our brain when we respond to other people's suffering And what they found changes how we should think about empathy and care."
  },
  {
    "start": 465.76,
    "end": 470.219,
    "text": "When we empathize with someone in pain We feel a version of their pain ourselves."
  },
  {
    "start": 470.82,
    "end": 473.32,
    "text": "That is what makes empathy hard and uncomfortable."
  },
  {
    "start": 473.96,
    "end": 481.76,
    "text": "We're not just witnessing people's distress, we are carrying our version of it... ...and humans are naturally inclined to avoid"
  },
  {
    "start": 481.86,
    "end": 482.14,
    "text": "pain.\""
  },
  {
    "start": 483.099,
    "end": 490.64,
    "text": "And Singer's research showed that this happens because empathy activates the same parts of the brain… …that process our own pain."
  },
  {
    "start": 491.42,
    "end": 493.479,
    "text": "Compassion does something different!"
  },
  {
    "start": 493.88,
    "end": 498.479,
    "text": "It doesn't pull us into other person's pain – it connects empathy with care."
  },
  {
    "start": 499.3,
    "end": 503.12,
    "text": "So they are different operations, and they're not meant to work alone."
  },
  {
    "start": 504.06,
    "end": 505.8,
    "text": "Empathy gives us the information."
  },
  {
    "start": 506.32,
    "end": 507.039,
    "text": "Care moves us."
  },
  {
    "start": 507.26,
    "end": 508.3,
    "text": "do something with it."
  },
  {
    "start": 509.02,
    "end": 512.2,
    "text": "Most of have been leading with empathy but without care."
  },
  {
    "start": 513.02,
    "end": 516.86,
    "text": "No wonder has drained so much energy Without producing better results."
  },
  {
    "start": 518.88,
    "end": 521.82,
    "text": "Our empathy was just mirroring what another person felt."
  },
  {
    "start": 522.36,
    "end": 525.64,
    "text": "It didn't motivate us provide help people actually needed."
  },
  {
    "start": 526.48,
    "end": 530.1,
    "text": "But as you can see Our body has always carried this connection."
  },
  {
    "start": 530.74,
    "end": 533.74,
    "text": "Using it had become difficult through the language we used."
  },
  {
    "start": 534.58,
    "end": 543.24,
    "text": "Now I certainly think there are a few more reasons why care got left behind in practice, but timing was probably what mattered most for leadership development."
  },
  {
    "start": 544.08,
    "end": 546.4,
    "text": "By that time neuroscience made the distinction."
  },
  {
    "start": 546.62,
    "end": 554.48,
    "text": "our understanding of empathy Was built around the language reused and It had become the version that could be measured and observed."
  },
  {
    "start": 555.24,
    "end": 561.18,
    "text": "It hadn't been recognized that empathy and care are separate, trainable and observable capabilities."
  },
  {
    "start": 561.94,
    "end": 574.28,
    "text": "So mixing empathy with care has led us to focus heavily on only one side of the coin And I think in terms of leadership capabilities this has cost as more than we have yet realized."
  },
  {
    "start": 574.94,
    "end": 581.56,
    "text": "Some of that costs shows In what we can regularly observe when managers have to respond difficult situations."
  },
  {
    "start": 582.42,
    "end": 584.62,
    "text": "Let me invite you into a small exercise."
  },
  {
    "start": 585.1,
    "end": 587.08,
    "text": "I'm going to give two short dialogues."
  },
  {
    "start": 587.52,
    "end": 600.7,
    "text": "Listen carefully See if you can recognize the form of empathy each leader is operating on But the project"
  },
  {
    "start": 603.74,
    "end": 614.32,
    "text": "is close to the finish line."
  },
  {
    "start": 614.74,
    "end": 615.18,
    "text": "Hang on!"
  },
  {
    "start": 615.62,
    "end": 619.06,
    "text": "But it IS affecting our work, we had another argument yesterday..."
  },
  {
    "start": 619.58,
    "end": 619.7,
    "text": "this"
  },
  {
    "start": 619.8,
    "end": 623.7,
    "text": "time in front of a team It feels like he's actively picking fights with me."
  },
  {
    "start": 624.26,
    "end": 626.24,
    "text": "How should I manage such situations?"
  },
  {
    "start": 626.8,
    "end": 628.52,
    "text": "...I really appreciate you telling my this."
  },
  {
    "start": 628.98,
    "end": 634.66,
    "text": "Both are excellent professionals and have full confidence that you will find your way out together."
  },
  {
    "start": 635.06,
    "end": 636.82,
    "text": "Keep me posted about how things go."
  },
  {
    "start": 636.88,
    "end": 637.16,
    "text": "Okay.."
  },
  {
    "start": 637.58,
    "end": 637.88,
    "text": "I will."
  },
  {
    "start": 638.72,
    "end": 639.58,
    "text": "And now for second"
  },
  {
    "start": 640.18,
    "end": 643.5,
    "text": "Will, I wanted us to talk a bit about how things have been going."
  },
  {
    "start": 644.08,
    "end": 646.64,
    "text": "You know how much i appreciate having you on the team."
  },
  {
    "start": 647.42,
    "end": 648.22,
    "text": "Uh... Thank you!"
  },
  {
    "start": 648.86,
    "end": 649.92,
    "text": "Is everything alright?"
  },
  {
    "start": 650.5,
    "end": 659.4,
    "text": "I've been thinking about last few months There's been several thing that has not gone quite as good As I hoped The integration project And presentation."
  },
  {
    "start": 659.48,
    "end": 660.14,
    "text": "last Tuesday."
  },
  {
    "start": 660.62,
    "end": 664.48,
    "text": "You showed up late To several meetings..I know you had a lot On your plate."
  },
  {
    "start": 665.44,
    "end": 667.74,
    "text": "There is just too much Going in my life right now."
  },
  {
    "start": 668.32,
    "end": 669.78,
    "text": "I know the project didn't go well."
  },
  {
    "start": 670.34,
    "end": 672.44,
    "text": "I just can't seem to get on top of all the work!"
  },
  {
    "start": 673.04,
    "end": 676.36,
    "text": "I know it's a lot right now, i'm sorry that feels overwhelming."
  },
  {
    "start": 676.84,
    "end": 679.3,
    "text": "try and set clearer priorities...I"
  },
  {
    "start": 679.34,
    "end": 684.54,
    "text": "am sorry..i don't want make any excuses but its been too much...."
  },
  {
    "start": 685.26,
    "end": 687.76,
    "text": "I understand you we all struggle sometimes....."
  },
  {
    "start": 688.38,
    "end": 689.36,
    "text": "I know i could do better."
  },
  {
    "start": 689.86,
    "end": 691.08,
    "text": "thank u for understanding"
  },
  {
    "start": 691.46,
    "end": 691.52,
    "text": "Of"
  },
  {
    "start": 691.66,
    "end": 692.2,
    "text": "course!!"
  },
  {
    "start": 692.68,
    "end": 693.44,
    "text": "I know you will"
  },
  {
    "start": 693.96,
    "end": 694.16,
    "text": "let us"
  },
  {
    "start": 694.24,
    "end": 695.36,
    "text": "talk again next week."
  },
  {
    "start": 696.2,
    "end": 697.5,
    "text": "Did you notice difference?"
  },
  {
    "start": 698.06,
    "end": 700.34,
    "text": "Didn't the first conversation feel rather cold?"
  },
  {
    "start": 700.9,
    "end": 703.52,
    "text": "Maybe you felt that second one was more empathetic."
  },
  {
    "start": 704.2,
    "end": 708.54,
    "text": "What he experienced is a difference between cognitive and emotional empathy."
  },
  {
    "start": 709.4,
    "end": 711.78,
    "text": "The First Manager notices conflict."
  },
  {
    "start": 712.18,
    "end": 718.02,
    "text": "He understands why it's problematic But doesn't feel with his team member And isn't motivated to help."
  },
  {
    "start": 718.64,
    "end": 721.18,
    "text": "That is, Cognitive Empathy without Care!"
  },
  {
    "start": 721.8,
    "end": 728.18,
    "text": "The person who comes in asking for Help leaves Without It and the additional weight of being told to sort it out herself."
  },
  {
    "start": 729.02,
    "end": 739.84,
    "text": "The second manager practices both, cognitive and emotional empathy but her discomfort with having to address performance issues leads her to sugarcoat them with empathy."
  },
  {
    "start": 740.62,
    "end": 745.96,
    "text": "She feels so vividly that actual message gets lost as conversation goes on."
  },
  {
    "start": 746.66,
    "end": 754.86,
    "text": "Her team member might catch a hint about prioritization but probably feels more relieved and excused than urged to change his behavior."
  },
  {
    "start": 755.6,
    "end": 758.92,
    "text": "Empathy without care again, just with a more emotional connection."
  },
  {
    "start": 759.78,
    "end": 764.46,
    "text": "Kim Scott author of the book Radical Candor calls this runous empathy."
  },
  {
    "start": 765.18,
    "end": 779.16,
    "text": "A manager gets so focused on protecting someone from discomfort that person leaves room reassured they're doing fine They have nothing act-on And next conversation most likely won't be about improved performance."
  },
  {
    "start": 779.96,
    "end": 785.98,
    "text": "The challenge with this form of empathy is that it requires a lot of energy without getting us anywhere."
  },
  {
    "start": 786.86,
    "end": 793.84,
    "text": "I experienced this couple years ago with the client, working with the leader... ...I observed a situation that wasn't working."
  },
  {
    "start": 794.54,
    "end": 803.54,
    "text": "He was experienced and successful A warm an empathetic person but he didn't know how to handle.. ..the situation that became more problematic."
  },
  {
    "start": 804.4,
    "end": 807.36,
    "text": "One team member going through very difficult time."
  },
  {
    "start": 807.78,
    "end": 814.24,
    "text": "A close family member had become seriously ill, the kind of illness that cannot be treated in a few weeks."
  },
  {
    "start": 815.08,
    "end": 819.6,
    "text": "The employee was doing her best while taking care of our family but she couldn't keep up!"
  },
  {
    "start": 820.3,
    "end": 825.84,
    "text": "The energy and time it took to be a caregiver were starting to show... ...the team was great."
  },
  {
    "start": 826.1,
    "end": 828.52,
    "text": "they supported and picked-up as much as they could."
  },
  {
    "start": 829.04,
    "end": 833.28,
    "text": "nobody was complaining But It wasn't sustainable And the leader knew it."
  },
  {
    "start": 834.04,
    "end": 839.28,
    "text": "Every conversation he had pulled him back into empathetic talks, but without a solution."
  },
  {
    "start": 839.94,
    "end": 844.36,
    "text": "He felt more and more exhausted... ...and even started to avoid the conversations!"
  },
  {
    "start": 844.96,
    "end": 849.86,
    "text": "He couldn't find a solution because he was stuck on empathy A few years earlier…."
  },
  {
    "start": 850.1,
    "end": 855.8,
    "text": "…he also taken care of his sick family member So he knew exactly what she is going through."
  },
  {
    "start": 856.5,
    "end": 866.18,
    "text": "He felt so much with her that he relived this own past And instead of having a clear conversation that this wasn't working for both sides, he kept repeating."
  },
  {
    "start": 866.98,
    "end": 869.44,
    "text": "I really know how hard it is…I've been there"
  },
  {
    "start": 869.5,
    "end": 869.98,
    "text": "myself.\"."
  },
  {
    "start": 870.74,
    "end": 871.44,
    "text": "The missing piece?"
  },
  {
    "start": 871.48,
    "end": 877.64,
    "text": "For him the ability to help...the care for her..for his team and finding a solution."
  },
  {
    "start": 878.4,
    "end": 885.9,
    "text": "You see i was actually there to support them on different topics But without a solution His team would have had no chance to move forward."
  },
  {
    "start": 888.78,
    "end": 891.38,
    "text": "So I gave him direction with a single question."
  },
  {
    "start": 892.12,
    "end": 894.56,
    "text": "Have you asked her what she needs most right now?"
  },
  {
    "start": 899.5,
    "end": 919.58,
    "text": "but it was the one that led both of them to see what could be done."
  },
  {
    "start": 920.48,
    "end": 927.72,
    "text": "And although it wasn't an easy solution, they managed to find an agreement that not only allowed her take more time for her family…."
  },
  {
    "start": 928.36,
    "end": 931.38,
    "text": "…but also gave her security she would keep her job!"
  },
  {
    "start": 932.32,
    "end": 936.48,
    "text": "He managed to shift part-of his work and freeed the team's capacity again."
  },
  {
    "start": 937.28,
    "end": 940.5,
    "text": "Finally he took care –and did what he could help."
  },
  {
    "start": 941.44,
    "end": 946.38,
    "text": "Now before we move further into Care... I just want to mention another form of empathy."
  },
  {
    "start": 947.26,
    "end": 953.88,
    "text": "It's called dark empathy, maybe you've come across it if You listen to the episode call The Power Paradox?"
  },
  {
    "start": 954.52,
    "end": 961.04,
    "text": "You may remember the Dark Tri-Trades Noisicism Machiavellianism and subclinical psychopathy."
  },
  {
    "start": 961.96,
    "end": 968.46,
    "text": "in the Episode i also talked about managers high on these traits using the language Of Empathy To Manipulate."
  },
  {
    "start": 969.28,
    "end": 976.9,
    "text": "For many years, personality psychologists assumed a lack of empathy to be a key reason for such leaders to behave the way they do."
  },
  {
    "start": 977.92,
    "end": 982.68,
    "text": "So when they studied people high on these traits... ...they expected to find no empathy."
  },
  {
    "start": 983.72,
    "end": 985.44,
    "text": "Surprisingly… They didn't!"
  },
  {
    "start": 986.08,
    "end": 996.24,
    "text": "About one in five people in their study scored high on both dark triad rates and empathy And the rate appears even higher in senior management positions."
  },
  {
    "start": 996.92,
    "end": 1005.1,
    "text": "What surprised the researchers most was that these people scored high on both kinds of empathy—cognitive and effective empathy."
  },
  {
    "start": 1005.82,
    "end": 1011.32,
    "text": "The cognitive ability clearly makes sense, such people thrive because they can read people well."
  },
  {
    "start": 1012.12,
    "end": 1020.72,
    "text": "The emotional empathy can be debated —most wouldn't expect such people to actually feel the distress of other people when we see how they handle it."
  },
  {
    "start": 1021.46,
    "end": 1029.8,
    "text": "Whether the people in this study actually felt it or whether to perform feeling it convincingly, even research can't fully tell us."
  },
  {
    "start": 1030.4,
    "end": 1031.66,
    "text": "But the result is the same."
  },
  {
    "start": 1032.44,
    "end": 1039.0,
    "text": "what was clearly missing was compassion—the ability to connect empathy with care and the willingness to help."
  },
  {
    "start": 1039.84,
    "end": 1045.04,
    "text": "So giving empathy training to leaders high on dark tri-trades will not get them to care."
  },
  {
    "start": 1045.8,
    "end": 1048.88,
    "text": "They'll just use more effectively to manipulate."
  },
  {
    "start": 1049.52,
    "end": 1053.58,
    "text": "And this not only matters in how we select & promote such people."
  },
  {
    "start": 1054.16,
    "end": 1058.82,
    "text": "It has a strong impact on the people they work with, especially the ones that lead."
  },
  {
    "start": 1059.46,
    "end": 1066.62,
    "text": "And it also connects to the third type of people I mentioned in the beginning – The managers who don't see empathy as useful at all."
  },
  {
    "start": 1067.42,
    "end": 1074.66,
    "text": "They are often the one's who create and support environments where dark triad traits get overlooked or even rewarded."
  },
  {
    "start": 1075.46,
    "end": 1091.62,
    "text": "Now when i say we got lost in translation & focus too much on empathy At the cost overlooking care I'm not saying we should invest less in empathy, because dark empathy and the lack of care only thrive where empathy and care are not part of leadership culture."
  },
  {
    "start": 1092.44,
    "end": 1096.72,
    "text": "And we can observe carelessness across all layers of our society."
  },
  {
    "start": 1097.66,
    "end": 1115.04,
    "text": "That's why i am saying it needs more attention now especially because AI technology holds a power that could move humanity into very different directions toward our extinction or extension using AI as a tool that finally shows what we care."
  },
  {
    "start": 1115.84,
    "end": 1118.34,
    "text": "The stakes are high, We can all see this by now!"
  },
  {
    "start": 1119.06,
    "end": 1121.48,
    "text": "So the question is What Is Care?"
  },
  {
    "start": 1121.96,
    "end": 1123.12,
    "text": "And how was it different?"
  },
  {
    "start": 1123.88,
    "end": 1126.42,
    "text": "Let me give you the clearest definition I've come across."
  },
  {
    "start": 1127.0,
    "end": 1129.12,
    "text": "It comes from philosopher Nell Nottings."
  },
  {
    "start": 1129.82,
    "end": 1136.36,
    "text": "She wrote about care in the nineteen eighties Decades before neuroscience could scan our brains to see where its sits."
  },
  {
    "start": 1137.2,
    "end": 1139.54,
    "text": "she said That care has two parts."
  },
  {
    "start": 1140.06,
    "end": 1144.08,
    "text": "The first part is full attention to the person, really seeing them."
  },
  {
    "start": 1144.6,
    "end": 1147.6,
    "text": "Hearing what they are saying and what they're not saying."
  },
  {
    "start": 1148.36,
    "end": 1154.6,
    "text": "This is the empathy part developing the resonance and willingness To be present in someone's situation."
  },
  {
    "start": 1155.48,
    "end": 1158.68,
    "text": "The second part Is What Turns Attention Into Action."
  },
  {
    "start": 1159.26,
    "end": 1164.68,
    "text": "Our motivation shifts We stop being focused on our goals And what feels easier for us."
  },
  {
    "start": 1165.4,
    "end": 1170.58,
    "text": "So Not Protecting Our Image Of Being A Nice Leader or avoiding harder conversations."
  },
  {
    "start": 1171.4,
    "end": 1184.18,
    "text": "Instead, we shift to what actually helps giving feedback that needs to land instead of sugarcoating it with empathy finding ways That really help both sides and are not just focused on company goals."
  },
  {
    "start": 1185.06,
    "end": 1193.1,
    "text": "Empathy in care connect In a way that allows for decisions that bring real solutions And these decisions Are NOT soft at all!"
  },
  {
    "start": 1193.88,
    "end": 1195.04,
    "text": "That's What my customer did."
  },
  {
    "start": 1195.46,
    "end": 1202.16,
    "text": "He found the best possible solution by having the harder conversation that this situation wasn't sustainable."
  },
  {
    "start": 1202.62,
    "end": 1213.02,
    "text": "By shifting from his discomfort of having to address it before finding a solution acceptable to both sides, Nottings called this motivational displacement."
  },
  {
    "start": 1213.58,
    "end": 1217.82,
    "text": "Our motivation shifts from our own goals to other person's needs."
  },
  {
    "start": 1217.96,
    "end": 1225.74,
    "text": "The point she made was care without reorientation isn't really care It is just understanding."
  },
  {
    "start": 1226.64,
    "end": 1232.28,
    "text": "So yes, understanding is our starting point and most of us already managed this pretty well."
  },
  {
    "start": 1233.02,
    "end": 1234.16,
    "text": "Now it's time to act!"
  },
  {
    "start": 1234.8,
    "end": 1242.9,
    "text": "If you want feel the difference between empathy & care in your own leadership just one question can do a lot for moving into action."
  },
  {
    "start": 1243.72,
    "end": 1245.24,
    "text": "I mentioned earlier."
  },
  {
    "start": 1245.92,
    "end": 1247.54,
    "text": "What do need most right now?"
  },
  {
    "start": 1248.24,
    "end": 1251.16,
    "text": "The single questions changes orientation."
  },
  {
    "start": 1253.08,
    "end": 1257.04,
    "text": "It moves you out of your own resonance and into the other person's reality."
  },
  {
    "start": 1257.66,
    "end": 1261.22,
    "text": "It signals that you're willing to do something with what you are hearing."
  },
  {
    "start": 1261.88,
    "end": 1266.06,
    "text": "This also gives a person in front of you, The chance to reflect on this themselves."
  },
  {
    "start": 1266.62,
    "end": 1279.3,
    "text": "People will struggle not only need empathy They also need orientation towards solution And That is clearly the responsibility Of leader To give orientation Towards finding A Solution."
  },
  {
    "start": 1280.16,
    "end": 1288.34,
    "text": "Now for anyone who still struggles with the word care, I really hope this episode was able to show you that Care is not a personality trait."
  },
  {
    "start": 1288.88,
    "end": 1295.78,
    "text": "It's also not primarily female skill or whatever kind of stereotype You have learned to associate it with."
  },
  {
    "start": 1296.44,
    "end": 1298.92,
    "text": "Care Is Human And its an ability."
  },
  {
    "start": 1299.18,
    "end": 1302.12,
    "text": "we all develop through experiencing care ourselves."
  },
  {
    "start": 1302.86,
    "end": 1311.2,
    "text": "This starts when were born as helpless little babies dependent on care To survive And certainly we all experienced care in very different ways."
  },
  {
    "start": 1311.84,
    "end": 1315.92,
    "text": "Maybe that is something which also led most training programs to stay away from it?"
  },
  {
    "start": 1316.5,
    "end": 1324.08,
    "text": "When you look at your own caring behavior and how you respond to other people's needs, You will also reflect on the care you've received yourself."
  },
  {
    "start": 1324.78,
    "end": 1330.64,
    "text": "so It comes along with a lot of introspection and self-awareness work connected To How We Care."
  },
  {
    "start": 1331.5,
    "end": 1340.8,
    "text": "So if you haven't experienced a caring environment or relationships In The Past You can't be drawn back into these experiences the moment you start practicing care."
  },
  {
    "start": 1341.58,
    "end": 1348.24,
    "text": "I grew up very independently because both of my parents were working and i had to take care of myself from an early age."
  },
  {
    "start": 1348.92,
    "end": 1359.2,
    "text": "The independence and self-responsibility that developed was often something, but they left me less caring in situations when other people required more help."
  },
  {
    "start": 1359.78,
    "end": 1373.36,
    "text": "As a younger manager ,I strongly focused on getting people solve problems by themselves And it took a couple of challenging situations to finally reflect on this self-focus and care enough to shift my perspective."
  },
  {
    "start": 1373.94,
    "end": 1384.28,
    "text": "No one can do that in our world for you, but the moment you move towards genuine care independent from your own experience You will learn something extremely valuable."
  },
  {
    "start": 1385.06,
    "end": 1386.16,
    "text": "Care propagates."
  },
  {
    "start": 1386.56,
    "end": 1396.46,
    "text": "It's almost infectious The moment we start caring about others... ...it often creates domino effect that travels through entire teams and organizations."
  },
  {
    "start": 1397.18,
    "end": 1398.0,
    "text": "And the best part?"
  },
  {
    "start": 1398.42,
    "end": 1399.48,
    "text": "Care can be trained!"
  },
  {
    "start": 1399.98,
    "end": 1407.92,
    "text": "Tania Zinger's lab has been studying what happens in the brain when people practice care deliberately, and what they found is striking."
  },
  {
    "start": 1408.5,
    "end": 1413.04,
    "text": "daily practice over just a few weeks changes our brains response."
  },
  {
    "start": 1413.48,
    "end": 1429.48,
    "text": "People who train care show stronger activation In The Networks tied to warmth motivation and helping and less activation in the distress networks, which means they can feel what another person is going through without collapsing into it."
  },
  {
    "start": 1430.18,
    "end": 1441.32,
    "text": "You see practicing care actually helps us to be present and to act —and that's a shift we're looking for— not less empathy but more care to turn it into useful"
  },
  {
    "start": 1441.42,
    "end": 1441.74,
    "text": "action.\"."
  },
  {
    "start": 1442.66,
    "end": 1448.58,
    "text": "So when I look at challenges that come along with care, daring-to-care says exactly what you need…."
  },
  {
    "start": 1449.32,
    "end": 1450.44,
    "text": "It isn't just courage."
  },
  {
    "start": 1451.72,
    "end": 1455.48,
    "text": "We also need to accept that we've been trained on an incomplete picture."
  },
  {
    "start": 1456.34,
    "end": 1463.98,
    "text": "If you didn't experience much care yourself and reflecting on it feels too tough, dare-to-care do the work – It helps!"
  },
  {
    "start": 1464.76,
    "end": 1474.66,
    "text": "And of course Care needs courage because it clearly costs us something…it costs us time hard conversations agency and advocacy for human needs."
  },
  {
    "start": 1475.12,
    "end": 1478.78,
    "text": "decisions that don't protect our comfort actions."
  },
  {
    "start": 1478.88,
    "end": 1480.96,
    "text": "they turn into caring leadership instead."
  },
  {
    "start": 1481.76,
    "end": 1484.82,
    "text": "Empathy gives us the language to understand others better."
  },
  {
    "start": 1485.56,
    "end": 1488.94,
    "text": "Care gives us motivation and ideas that help them."
  },
  {
    "start": 1489.92,
    "end": 1493.84,
    "text": "So let's dare-to-care, turn it into a key leadership practice!"
  },
  {
    "start": 1494.62,
    "end": 1498.84,
    "text": "In The Reflection episode I will give you practices which are good starting point."
  },
  {
    "start": 1499.6,
    "end": 1501.44,
    "text": "Stay curious stay tuned."
  },
  {
    "start": 1502.28,
    "end": 1507.56,
    "text": "Thanks for tuning in to New Work Playbook where work gets better because people matter."
  }
]